Fool Me Twice

Well “guy number 6” turned out to be just a big jerk as the guys before. As you may know, we were supposed to be going to the NASCAR event together. Since this guy had practically begged me to go, I even called out of work because he begged me so badly to go with him.

Well yesterday morning he texts me saying “not to sound like a jerk but you’re going to have to pay me for the ticket”. I was like “okay…how much is the ticket?” him claiming the ticket is $100. It’s not like I don’t have the money to go but…I’d rather not spend it on something like watching cars go around a track which…I could do at home really.

Then he went so far to tell me that he wasn’t sure if he could afford for me to go if I didn’t pay him for the ticket. It’s like…you could afford $200 when you bought 2 tickets in the first place but suddenly you have to check to see if you can afford it when you’ve already purchased the tickets prior to ever even having me in your life? Doesn’t make much sense to me, I mean, it was either he brings me or he pays for a ticket to an event he will go to by himself and waste $100 since he couldn’t find anyone else willing to go out of there way for him.

It’s like, the other night he tried to tell me how we should do dinner and a movie and get a room together. When we ended up just watching a DVD he had already purchased and hanging at his place so…how much do you think that would’ve cost if we had done what he wanted to in the first place? Let me do some research on the cost of those 3 things combined…

Normal Dine-in Dinner: Est. $40 for 2 w/tip
Average Matinee Movie Tickets (w/out food): $10/x2 Adults
Cheapest Hotel Online: $65.00/1 Night (16.5 miles from his place)
Total=$125.00

Looks like his cheap-self could’ve afforded it to me. Even if we had just had dinner and the hotel or a movie and the hotel, it would’ve been over $100 or a little under. Unless, he wants to take me to McDonalds and go for the Dollar Menu on our first date? Ha-ha. He didn’t even want to go to a normal movie theatre…he wanted to go to one of the ones in a little downtown area so…it probably would’ve been a cheaper ticket for some older movie. What the heck was I thinking? This is why we should always listen to our instincts. No wonder he thinks I’m out of his league (because I apparently am)…I guess because I expect to be treated like a queen, which he knew anyway, heh. He’s a manager that lives with his parents, how could he not afford $100? I think a typical kindergartner has $100 without any having a job!

So, back to the story at hand. He claims to have texted me tons of times to my cell phone…which I didn’t receive a single text from him since earlier in the day when he had requested ticket money about 12 hours after I had initially just left his house telling him I could go with him to the race. So I waited till 9pm to finally text him and ask him why he never got back to me on him being able to afford for me to go. He claims in those tons of messages to me that he was trying to tell me how he could afford for me to go with him after all. So I got pretty happy about that and then I proceed to ask him if he still wanted me to go with him. He then says how he ended up getting his Dad to go since he didn’t hear from me. It's like; your hearing from me now, why can’t you just tell your Dad you had wanted to take me?! So whatever, I waited a little bit and texted with “well, I was waiting for your call to tell you that I could afford to go with you after all”, just to be queen-bee about it. He hasn’t said anything to me since, and I had to tell my work to disregard my “family emergency”, shame on me, and him.

Word to the wise…if a guy preaches he is some “southern gentlemen”, it’s just the same as a guy trying to tell you he’s a “nice guy”. In reality, if he’s a nice guy, he doesn’t go around saying that he is. Also means…he’s probably a southern hick or prick is more the word.

Better Judgement

As women I believe we should try to give some men the "benefit of the doubt" as you read from my previous post and also be keen to what your instincts are telling you about someone.


Today I was meeting up with a new guy, which makes him date number 6 this year(although I have yet to blog about guy number 5). We have been friends on MySpace.com for some time now although we've only chatted on and off...up until now of course. He writes me and tells me how he has gotten out of a relationship he had been in and how he is looking to meet someone new in his life. Although he acts as if I'm out of his league he is very sweet to me and I try to assure him that I'm just me...no set type really and I try to assure him that we're more alike then he ever could imagine.

So today we were suppose to go on a date and he was so excited about it around 8am and he's all texting my cell phone and everything. Little to my knowledge he had a doctors appointment that didn't go at all well later that day. To make a long story short, he starts being indecisive about our date and over reacting and just...being plain odd. So we basically come to a conclusion that today is just...not going to be at all a good day for us to meet up. So we cancel the date, he feels horrible but I know its for the best although I was a little pissed he had waited so long to inform me which he did appologize for.

So I eat dinner and about an hour later he's calling my cell. He changes his mind saying how he does want to go out now. Which...has thrown me for a loop to say the least because I was basically ready to stay in and call it a night after basically being stood-up in such an odd way. So I cave in and tell him that okay, we'll meet up. 20 minutes later he's calling me asking where I am...I hadn't even finished getting ready yet. So feeling aggravted from earlier and then him being too pushy I just tell him that...I don't think today will be a good day for us to hangout. So I basically stand him up(a first for me but...he did it first!).

Then I turn into him and text him and write him online about how I'm sorry for cancelling on him like that and so forth. So we gradually work our way into a conversation again trying to assist the issues at hand and I just had to find out what happened at his doctors appointment that he wouldn't tell me about earlier but he had to discuss it with his parents so urgently.

Come to find out not only was his blood pressure high but he could possibly have cancer which was unexpected news to him. I mean, I was in shock really and felt horrible for him and I'm praying to God he doesn't have cancer because this guy is just someone after my own heart. Cancer is a very sensitive subject for me. Having lost one of my most dearest family members to it has been one of the hardest things for my family and I. So yea, I mean...I felt horrible for the guy and just wanted to show him my love and support and reassure him that I will always be someone that's there for him regardless if we ever have a meaningful relationship or not.

I will be the first to tell you that I was crying and praying for this guy today. So, we ended up spending time at his place tonight and watching a DVD after all the standing up we had done to each other today we couldn't stand it anymore. Not only was it nice just being with someone that looked at me with such admiration and an open heart to finding new love in his life but he appreciated me even more-so because I had showed how much I cared for him since he has basically been a stranger to me up until recently and meeting him for the first time today. He also had tickets to the Nascar event this week and I've called out of work "family emergency" on my way over to his place to be able to go with him(he seemed happy and surprised I did so because I had mentioned earlier I had to be at work that day and couldn't go) since he had no one else able to go with him and was worried about having an extra ticket with no one to use it. Life is too precious and too short to worry about things like work because to me family, friends and God always comes first.

Well, for anyone else reading this blog out there, your thoughts and prayers for him will be greatly appreciated. He'll find out next week if he does have cancer or not, I'll do my best to keep everyone posted.

Benefit of a Doubt

For those of you that read my last blog post I ended up going out with a few of these "Losers" just to try to give them the benefit of a doubt.

Guy number "Two" although I have told him I have been dating someone new he'll still randomly send text messages to my cell. The one this week just read "Sup" so 5 hours later I decided to simply reply "NM" (Not Much) and I haven't heard anymore from him since which is perfectly fine with me.

So guy number "Three" has became a friend and he realized this week that he really does need to remove his personal ad he placed on the dating website we met from because what it comes down to apparently is...he has been heart broken a bit beyond repair. I think we both know he does really seem to like me, he's just a bit in denial I think. He has told me that if he was to be with someone right now, it would be me.

Guy number "Four" apparently didn't know how to get in my pants fast enough(which didn't happen). So he started turning into a jerk perhaps thinking that reverse-psychology or bringing another person down would make him seem out of my league or make him feel better about himself. He'd say such rude things to me as...

"you look older than me" (when everyone says I look 18 and he looks his age)
"you have wrinkles" (even babies have wrinkles, ha-ha)
"don't get any bigger" (when he hits on women a lot bigger than myself)

Anyway, I believe he was just trying to make a quick buck out of me by wanting to use my design skills to his advantage. This man is perhaps insane which is why...he is I claim "single for good reason". As for my comeback to all his immature remarks "at least I don't have white hair yet", he shut his mouth after knowing that I noticed his gray, ha-ha. Its funny comparing these remarks to the ones he said in my previous post.

Everythings Anew

As 2008 has approached and year of the "rat" is also upon us I have decided to tell you the "tail" (rat...tail, get it? heh) of my recent dating excursions since January 2008.

The first three men this year have all been from the same personals website. The first was a young man that took me on a date to a Japanese Steak House (he knew of my love for sushi). He seemed okay but I couldn't get three words in at any point throughout our date. Nor am I as into snow sports as he apparently was and I could probably care less about how he ended up with two of his sisters cats (I'm allergic to cats!). Maybe I should've told him how I had two pet rats...plus it's now even year of the rat in Chinese culture. So, I later left the guy a message on the dating site saying that "I'm sorry, we just...aren't a match" basically.

Guy number "Two" was very cute and fun (30-ish) but...not at all as intelligent as he tried to make you believe he was. Everything was going great, we even shared some kissing between us at the end of the date. He had planned to meet up again the following week but ended up standing me up instead and making an excuse that he had eatten bad fish and was tired...and bluntly stated so in his text message to me which was sent to me at last minute after I had just texted him. Besides...he didn't know what he was looking for, be it a relationship or a fling and I know what I want so, it just wasn't meant to be for us.

Number "Three" was a man close in age and we had so much in common. Unfortunately the things we didn't have in common were strong enough to out-weigh the good things we had in common. Although I wasn't crazy about him at first, he seemed crazy about me...but later the tables seemed to have turned. Unforunately he seemed more into being a "home body" and doing what he wanted than caring about what I wanted. So when he didn't believe in celebrating Valentine's Day "anymore" and I did care...it was the last straw and I had to let him go. If he thinks V-Day should be every day and not just one day out of 365 days a year...where were all my chocolates and flowers before? (ha-ha).

Last but not least this year is guy number "Four" and he's old enough to be my Dad. So far he almost talks down to me as if I'm unexperienced in life when he's a complete moron for doing so or perhaps even thinking that way?. He seems to believe their is some strong "energy" going between us but honestly...I don't feel or see any "energy" or chemistry or anything between us. He's such an idiot because he doesn't even remember having briefly said "hello" to me several months back and is claiming now to have just taken notice of me. Needless to say he took notice of me while he was on a blind date with someone else at the bar I always frequent. Saying how when he saw me he didn't even want to be on his blind date and how he would've rather been chatting and spending time with me. So far he keeps texting my cell phone with these messages...

"Lets not hold anything back lets go for it"
"Give it time...and lets be each others focus"
"I see a possible future with you"
"I'm going to make you happy...I'm going to show you that I am the one"
"You seem genuine...I sense a strong desire to connect and settle down"
"I haven't seen a woman like you in a long, long time"
"you're a good girl that's what I need, that's what I've been holding out for"
"you may fall madly in love...just warning you"

Is this guy for real?! (Heh). Do those pickup lines even really work?! Maybe if they felt more "genuine" to me.

The "Other" Woman

To catch everyone up to speed on things with the "DJ"... it never did go as planned. Turned out he had a "Girl Friend" living with him and is a flirt. Well, he's an old pervert anyway that just wanted to get lucky with me, and I wasn't having any of that.

So this past December I turned the big "24" years old which....only left me with 1 year to reach my "25 year plan" goal of finding my "Mr. Right" and getting wed. Obviously...I don't see that happening thus far but I still haven't given up hope that my "Mr. Right" and not the "Mr. Right Now" is out there.

Older Man Mishap?

So the DJ I had talked about in the last blog entry had asked me to come out to see him DJ this past Thursday night...so I did of course. The week had gone by though where neither of us had each others phone number and he didn't even know my name.

I danced with many different men/women of all ages and races that night and I had a total blast but of course I couldn't stop checking out the DJ and smiling at him and really only wanting to be dancing with him that night. Although the DJ had asked me to come out that night...I couldn't help but feel that perhaps he wished I hadn't. Toward the end of night I waited for him as usual because I wanted to spend some time with him just as we did last week. He claimed he couldn't hangout that long because he had to DJ for a wedding the next day...same excuse as last week of course. So as we walked out the door he got stopped by some people outside to chat for a second but I just kept walking to my car because well...I was feeling a little pushed to the side.

By the time I had gotten inside my car who do I see running up to my car... the DJ. So I smile and let him in my car. He finally gets my phone number and asks me my name as well. So I figure he'll call or text me soon as he proclaimed to do. He kissed me goodnight and then walked over to his car.

So the next night I go out to the bar knowing that he has to DJ for a wedding and won't even be at the bar(assuming of course). Turns out...he came into the bar as a local and not as the DJ...but did he take the time to call me or ask me out to spend time with me...no, he didn't. Of course I was feeling hurt and I had left the bar early that night, but I didn't even know he was their when I left until a friend told me they had seen him their. He was on the opposite side of the bar and didn't bother asking anyone about me apparently.

I really wanted to spend some time with him but I think because of our age difference...he's blowing me off a little because he's perhaps uncertain. Sure I'm an attractive girl and had hot looking guys pulling me in close to dance but...I only wanted the DJ. I'm not sure what he's thinking...perhaps he doesn't really want me after all. I figure next week...I won't be so nice, especially if he doesn't call me before next Thursday arrives...or I just won't show up at all next week and see how he feels about that. Lets just say if I do go...I'm going to pretend to not notice him and dance and be with any guy I feel like instead of waiting for the DJ to make up his mind or tell me how he really feels.

Dating Older Men

I've stuck a fancy for a man twice my age for the past year now. Whom until recently we ended up making-out in his car and what not (Reminding you that he's older than my mother and he has a 21yr old daughter that has a child, making him one of the most adorably-cute Grandfather's ever). We had never even made a real pass at one another before and I had always thought he was attractive although unsure if he had felt the same for myself.

Until two weeks ago when he announced outside around my moms friends and my mother that he wanted to give me a huge hug goodbye and gave me a nice kiss on my cheek goodbye. Sure their was no perversion or anything of that nature, just a kind hearted kiss goodnight as my friends and mother walked out of a bar we frequent. My mother saying out loud "Ohhh, he likes younger women!" (ha-ha).

I was totally thinking about that kiss he had added into the hug he so badly wanted to give me that night. My mind began to wonder of the possibilities of being with him and if their was more meaning to that kiss than just a kiss goodnight...also thinking that since this man works at this bar as a DJ, he has seen me with several other men closer to my age and what could be going on in his mind about me...if anything at all.

My mom has yet to discover is age and she claims that lately he has been showing interest in me, although we both noticed before he can be a little flirt although neither one of us could confess to having ever saw him kiss another woman on the cheek at that bar.

So the next week I decided to head back out to the bar and do things solo to see if perhaps...their was more than meets the eye. It wasn't too crowded that night and as he was DJ-ing, I stood 10ft from him near the dance floor as he looked over and smiled at me and I gave a smile and friendly wave to him. He approached me and making small talk about asking who I came with or something of that nature and I told him that "I came to see you, you don't see me with anyone else now do you?", he smiled and laughed a little as if to believe I was joking but replied "really?? No you didn't...?". I confirmed that I did and he hugged me yet again although he was a bit bashful about it but he also seemed happy...perhaps that a much younger woman he had seen for a year now had made a pass at him. He then urged me to kiss him if I really meant to come out to see him and him-alone tonight...I was a bit shy about it because he was still working and all...so I giggled and didn't kiss him but I told him I would later on. He was just like "see, I knew you didn't just come here to see me" with a smile on his face as he walked back up to the DJ booth looking over at me with a bashful smile in slight disbelief of what I had told him.

Sure my mom will totally disapprove if she finds out his real age but....I'm really starting to like him and I know he must fancy me too. So on that note...

-Is age really just a number?

-Will our age difference cause too much conflict between the two of us and eventually end abruptly?

-Should I follow my heart or my Family?

These are questions and topics that arise for many other woman out their and the best advice I believe a person can say is....to follow your heart. If you believe your family is going to disapprove just keep the new relationship on the "down-low". It's better to discover your relationship/s out for yourself and learn from experience than having to break-off something that could be a beautiful one. If things positively progress in the relationship, than deal with it than instead of stressing a lot over it now.